Monday, 25 July 2016

Confessions of a Beauty Novice

confessions of a beauty novice

Updated 9/9/17

Forgive me beauty gods, for I am a sinner who's probably gonna sin again...

I've just figured out how to do my brows in the last year.

I've also just learnt what the "crease" is & where it is on my eyelid in the last 12-18 months.

I'm terrified of looking like a clown, so I don't apply much blush to my cheeks. Only problem is, I can't live without the stuff because I look like the walking dead if I don't wear it.

I neither own nor use a primer of any sort, whether it be for the face, eyes, whatever. That could change soon though.  This has changed since I now use both a face & an eye primer.

I don't fake tan, despite being the perfect candidate for it. The possibility of turning out some shade of oompa loompa....*shudders*...sorrynotsorry to the people who get blinded by my whiteness on the beach. I wouldn't rule out using it in the future though.

I'm nervous about wearing bright eyeshadow, so I stick to neutrals....that's if I'm wearing eyeshadow, which is rare because I (believe I) suck at applying the stuff and can't seem to make it look good on my (possibly) semi-hooded & (definitely) close-set eyes.

Speaking of eyeshadow...I've yet to master a multi-hued eyeshadow look. I'd really love to though.

I'm not good at applying eyeliner & when I do, I'm unsure if I'm doing it right. (Can someone tell me how to properly line your lower lash line?) I have since mastered lining my upper lash line. Still working on properly lining my lower lash line though.

I neither own nor use bronzer, highlighters or illuminators.

I don't understand contouring, nor do I think it would suit me and my pale self. Strobing I can sorta understand, but contouring?

via Meme Generator

The idea of lining my waterline freaks the shit out of me... do eyelash curlers, thanks to the curler-wielding chick in this video! (Go to 1:53 & PREPARE TO BE SCARED.)

What's another thing that freaks me out? Nail salons. I've never paid someone for a mani/pedi because I'm utterly frightened of getting a nail infection.

I have a blonde moustache. Don't worry kids; it gets threaded away every 6 weeks. I do have some limits!

For the most part, I don't bother shaving my legs in winter...but in my defence, everyone with double X chromosomes does this. Am I right ladies?

I got my first grey hair at 16. Yep, you read that right, 16. Thanks genetics for making me go prematurely grey! (My hair's roughly one-third to one-half grey at present and in dire need of a dye job.)

I generally only cleanse my face at night unless I'm putting on makeup during the day, which isn't all that often. I have tried to get into the habit of cleansing & all that other jazz in the morning because I have noticed a difference in the way my skin feels when I do this, but I either don't think of it or simply can't be arsed. I now try & remember to cleanse/tone/moisturise etc of a morning because I've noticed what a difference it makes to my skin.

Aaaand I'm spent.

Oops I did it again...forgot to mention that this has been linked to the Monday Makeup Madness partay over at Fabulous and Fun Life.

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Have you got a beauty confession you'd like to make?


  1. Gwen gives me life! She has been my style icon since I saw this film clip in 96.

    Likewise, I do not bother defuzzing my legs in the winter months, I have fine blonde hair to the point where when I'm getting them done over summer, the waxer is like "Um is there even anything there?" so that's a bonus.

    Likewise, I cannot get a handle on contouring, I don't use primer or bronzer or fake tan. The rest is all practice and YouTube tutorials.

    1. I remember receiving Tragic Kingdom from some US friends my parents had at the time, but I think it took some time before Just A Girl became a hit. The eyelash curler bit in the vid has freaked me out ever since!

  2. I don't go for manis and pedis either. I went for a manicure once and the girl used an electric sander and cut my cuticles till they bled!! I used to go for pedis until I realized how unsanitary it really is!

    1. OMG you poor thing! See this is all part of why I don't do nail salons. At least if I DIY I know what I'm using & I'm not going to sand my cuticles until they bleed, or use some other bad practises.

    2. exactly! On another note, I can't figure out why blogger doesn't tell me when somenone responds to my comments. I literally have to come back if I remember and see if/what the response was. Maybe it's something I have to fix in some settings. Do you get an alert letting you know if someone replies to a comment you leave on their blog?

    3. I only know if (a) I sign into Blogger & check the comments section or (b) if I get a comment on an older post that I have to approve, then I get an email letting me know.

      The only other way to know if someone responds to a comment is if you click the "Notify me" box in the bottom right hand corner of the comments box, i.e. when you go to respond to someone. (Don't know if that makes sense at all - I'm not very tech! - but there is one. The only problem with it is you get not only your response, but so many other comments & responses from the same post in your inbox. If you can live with that, then it's ok.)

    4. Awesome! Thanks for letting me know. I never even noticed that "notify me" box nor would I have known what it was for. I comment on so many people's blogs and never get to see there responses to me. Thanks for the info! xo

    5. woo-hoo it worked! I just got an email that you replied!! :D

  3. I only ever got my nails done at one salon as I could trust them but I won't go anywhere else now that they closed. When you get a good face primer, you will never go back. Hey, I prime even when I don't put on foundation as I love the look of smooth skin. I am however in the same eyebrow and eyeshadow situation. I should practive more eyeshadow looks but I think I suck so I don't want to do it lol

    1. I think if you can find somewhere you trust, that's half the battle accomplished. I'm definitely looking into getting a primer, I just have to find one that doesn't contain too many chemicals & actually does the job.

    2. I am a fan of the smoothing primers so they aren't really natural but I have quite a few that are cruelty free. I haven't checked the ingredients on any of them so I should do that. If I find anything more natural I'll let you know :)

  4. My eyes are supersensitive and I wear glasses, eyeliner and I just don't see eye to eye - lol - sorry! That's why I'm in awe of bloggers like Kats who are so good at eye makeup and eyeliner!

    1. Hehe! I know, Kats is BRILLIANT at all that stuff & I admire her so much!

  5. Oh you gals are so sweet - thanks for the vote of confidence lovelies, it's just practice, and to be honest I look so crap without makeup, I've had to learn lol! My confessions? I've never had a mani or a pedi in my life, I let my legs go "fallow" in winter and I only contour my nose because it's so big (and getting bigger) xxx


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